This Week in Cinema, I Learned…May 5-11 2024
Written by Cameron Geiser
Welcome to This Week in Cinema, a yearlong film criticism project wherein I will be watching a new film that I haven't seen every single day.
Perhaps the most unpretentious week so far, this week in cinema I learned that sometimes you just need a second opinion. While that would have solved the problems of one main character this week, the idea of reaching out to others to confirm whether or not you're correct in your assumptions plays into each film. Honestly, in some films this concept needs to be applied to the villains or antagonists, but it is true that in each film if only the characters had communicated with each other, or others, the conflict wouldn't have happened. Which, I suppose means there wouldn't be any story to tell if they had communicated such things, so from a storytelling perspective I suppose the thing to learn here is how to better work your script to avoid such easy solutions to the conflicts you create. Or at least to add a line or beat where it makes sense that the characters wouldn't think to do such a thing. Joe Versus The Volcano actually does this by making Tom Hanks' character a hypochondriac therefore he immediately believes what his doctor tells him. This Week in Cinema may continue the trend of lower scores this month overall, but believe me, I am highly enjoying this month's theme and selections so far. Come back next week to see which films I consider a “comedy” for a change of pace. Hint: One of them is a John Carpenter film.
May 5th
Joe Versus The Volcano (1990)
3.5/5
For a movie about a sick, dying man jumping into a volcano- Joe Versus The Volcano sure seems to espouse a philosophy of life that fully embraces whimsy, magic, and the question of fate itself. Right from the opening scene I knew this movie was going to stand out, due at the very least to its flair with style. Joe (Tom Hanks) trudges to work in a gray and concrete world full of hard angles and muted colors set to a thoroughly beaten down song with lyrics like, “You load sixteen tons, what do ya get? Another day older and deeper in debt. Saint Peter don't you call me 'cause I can't go, I owe my soul to the company store.” In a dark, damp office with flickering fluorescent lights, Joe obviously hates his job, despises his Boss, and barely speaks to DeDe the secretary played by Meg Ryan, who also stars as two other women that enter Joe’s life through his soon to be extraordinary opportunity.
During a visit to his doctor, played by Robert Stack, Joe discovers that he has a rare condition called a “brain cloud” and that it will kill him in five to six months, even though he will feel terrific up until that point. Being a hypochondriac, Joe believes him and quits his job that day. The following morning a Billionaire named Graynamore (Lloyd Bridges) approaches Joe with a choice. Graynamore has sourced a rare mineral that he requires for his business on a remote island, the residents of which will only grant him the rights to the essential minerals if the Volcano on said Island can be satiated. The native tribe there has a ritual in which a sacrifice must be made, where every so many years the Waponis hurl a man, of his own free will, into the cradle of Lava thus securing the safety of the next generation.
Graynamore’s offer to Joe is to have unlimited funds for the next twenty days before being chaperoned by the billionaire's daughters (The other two Meg Ryan roles) which leads to an ocean voyage direct to the remote island- and then jumping into the Volcano. Live like a king, die like a man. This film does stand out from the pack in not only the concept, but in the writing and especially the otherworldly production design- by Bo Welch, who also designed Beetlejuice a few years prior. Joe Versus the Volcano is a quirky oddball movie, but one that’s worth the watch.
May 6th
Wagons East (1994)
2/5
I admire John Candy, and there’s a part of me that will always miss his presence in cinema. However, this film was the unfortunate end for John Candy, who died on set after finishing most of his principal photography. Wagons East has a few good ideas and jokes here and there, but it isn’t enough to merit a feature length film. No, this should have been a SNL sketch, there’s just enough comedy to wring from this one for a decent segment- not an all timer, but a serviceable one. As a film, it lacks. The basic premise is that a ragtag group of unsatisfied Western settlers decide the Old West just ain’t for them and they group together to hire a wagonmaster to lead them back east, back home. Unfortunately for them, that Wagonmaster is James Harlow (John Candy), the same Wagonmaster that led the Donner Party to its infamous doom years prior. There’s some crass jokes throughout the film regarding sexuality that haven't exactly aged well, poorly executed attempts at slapstick, and other lowest common denominator humor. It’s not the worst thing I’ve seen, but it’s a sad watch as Candy wasn’t at the heights of his abilities nor was he seemingly allowed to be comedic? In any case most of the film isn’t all that funny, but I didn’t hate it. I can’t recommend this one folks, look elsewhere for your chuckles and guffaws.
May 7th
Mad Monkey Kung Fu (1979)
2.5/5
More of a standard revenge film than the plucky lighthearted Kung Fu flick that the poster and title imply, Mad Monkey Kung Fu is a standard and serviceable martial arts movie at best. As with all Kung Fu films, there are two things that impact the film most in terms of sheer enjoyment: the characters and the fight scenes. Mad Monkey Kung Fu only somewhat succeeds in both categories. Chen (Chia-Liang Liu, who also directed the film) was a touring Martial Artist with his sister who happens to show off to the wrong guy in a drunken stupor and winds up getting his sister imprisoned as a sex slave and his hands crippled by the villain, Tuan (Lo Lieh). Fast forward a few years and Chen now works as a street performer with an actual Monkey and often fends off encroaching extortionists. After a while a quirky local thief named Monkey (Hou Hsiao) takes pity on Chen after witnessing one of the shakedowns and treats the fellow Martial Artist to a hearty meal.
I also feel I should put a trigger warning for animal violence as Chen’s actual pet Monkey, Ah-Mao, gets brutally murdered when the muscle comes back for more. This motivates Monkey to stand in for Ah-Mao during Chen’s next performance, sealing the friendship and eventually culminating in the duo taking on Tuan in the final act. The villains of this one feel unnecessarily brutal given the incongruous tone throughout the film. The result is a mishmash of missteps that may come from a lack of a clear vision since the director is also handling starring duties in the main role? Either way it’s a boiler plate revenge film with an abundance of bland tropes and only mildly interesting fight scenes.
May 8th
Five Superfighters (1978)
3.5/5
Now this is what I'm talking about. Five Superfighters is the sort of film that comes to mind when I think of what a Kung Fu movie should, or can, be. The story here isn't very compelling at all, it's quite simple really. When a Kung Fu master and his three students run afoul of a self titled “Corrector of Bad Kung Fu” the disciple of dastardly discipline destroys them in an extremely quick fashion. Humbled into deep shame they all return to their decrepit temple where the three students decide to all leave in the night to seek out new teachers and return later to avenge their teacher.
However, they do not tell him this and in the morning he rightfully believes that they abandoned him and he slumps into a sad alcoholic state for the majority of the movie, intermittently sharpening his skills with a blade in between drinking bouts. Each student meets a unique Kung Fu master with different visual styles and philosophies and goes through the typical training montage learning new things about themselves and their skillsets etc. Each new teacher is untraditional and unorthodox in their Kung Fu. They consist of a stoic Woman bean grinder who practices high-kicking legwork, a sassy yet physically disabled master of crane style, and a noble pole-fighting fisherman. When they all return to deliver their vengeance with their new mastery of unorthodox fighting techniques the result is a highly entertaining final fight sequence.
What really sets this film above the majority of Shaw Bros Kung Fu flicks (that I have seen so far) is the visual flare with a variety of different Kung Fu styles and the punched up cinematography- which has never been more energetic. Five Superfighters is a highly entertaining simple tale of shame and revenge- and I'm pretty sure this film has the most Kung Fu in it so far (With possibly The 36 Chambers of Shaolin as the major competitor in that department). If you're looking for Kung Fu, this film is it!
May 9th
Beavis and Butthead Do The Universe (2022)
3.5/5
As someone who enjoyed Beavis and Butthead in the past, and hadn’t kept up with their recent revival, I found this reboot of the series to be glorious. Series creator Mike Judge has a brilliant mind when it comes to sly social commentary and satire, sometimes the jokes and riffs are obvious and very stupid (an acceptable and expected level of stupidity mind you), but good lord the abundance of mockery directed at bureaucracy, it's beautiful. Beavis and Butthead Do The Universe functions as the connecting tissue between the 1990s and modern day, mostly by hucking those two idiots into a black hole that then dumps them into today's Texas. Beavis and Butthead have not changed an iota since the 90s and they are still very much single-minded in pursuing their goal of finally “scoring” with a woman. That woman happens to be astronaut turned Texas governor, Serena Ryan (Andrea Savage) in a hilarious misunderstanding by everyone involved. My favorite part was when Beavis and Butthead wander into a 2022 college campus and are informed of White Privilege- trust me, it's great. This one is probably personal preference oriented, but it was smarter than I expected, which is pretty ironic given the material.
May 10th
Monkeybone (2001)
3/5
As a fan of pretty much everything Brendan Fraser has done (I will get to The Whale later this year, I'm putting it off because I personally can't stand Darren Aronofsky's work, but for Brendan Fraser, I will gladly suffer), I knew I'd have to get around to the few films of his that I haven't seen yet. Monkeybone feels very much of its time, caught in the leftover 1990s malaise and comfort combination. The film follows a cartoonist, Stu Miley (Brendan Fraser) who’s animated pilot is picked up for production and product placement in the opening scene. Despite this, he's not much of a people person and seems unfazed by his newfound success. Though he doesn't have much time to settle into that success as he gets into a car crash and is put into a coma almost immediately. While in his own mind (or a nonphysical space shared by the lost minds of others? The film never quite pins down the logic of this place, which of course mystery is fine, I just want consistency) he’s transported to Down Town, a carnival pier of sorts where he meets the fully conscious and very sassy Monkeybone (John Turturro) in physical form.
The titular character is depicted through stop-motion as are a lot of the inhabitants of the interspatial zone. The visual style and flair in these scenes were inherently admirable and a big part of the allure of the film. I've always enjoyed stories where the main character travels to, or is stuck in, mythical and mysterious spaces and places. Most recently Miyazaki’s The Boy and The Heron did this spectacularly. The plot is mostly perfunctory, but it works for the film. Stu must escape Down Town, but he's betrayed by Monkeybone who takes control of Stu's body in the real world. However, Stu makes a deal with Death (Whoopi Goldberg) and invades the recently deceased body of a dead marathon runner portrayed by Chris Kattan in entertaining fashion. There are some good cameos and the cast sports a few big names like Bob Odenkirk as one of the surgeons chasing down the undead Chris Kattan, or Giancarlo Esposito as Hypnos, the veritable antagonist of Down Town. Monkeybone may not be the most impressive film ever made, but it was decent enough and a good contender for a “rainy day” movie.
May 11th
The Kid with The Golden Arm (1979)
2.5/5
I wasn't particularly impressed with The Kid with The Golden Arm, apologies if this is one of your favorites. Which seems to be the case with a lot of people when looking further into this film. I was not, and am not, part of that cohort. The Kid with The Golden Arm is the most cartoonish and base form of all Shaw Brothers films I have seen so far. A security bureau hires several people to chauffeur a horde of gold that's to be delivered to some refugees fallen on hard times. There's an arrogant swordsman and his girlfriend, two axe wielders simply called Long axe and Short axe, and my favorite character the wizened drunken master and sheriff of deadly valley, Hai To (Phillip Chung-Fung Kwok). As they journey through the deadly valley they encounter each of the four deadly masters of the valley; Silver Spear, Iron Robe, Brass Head, and finally The Kid with The Golden Arm (Who I was disappointed to find wasn't a child Kung Fu prodigy, but just a young man instilled with arrogance due to his high skill level).
This film is a bit at odds with itself when it comes to tone and atmosphere. The fights are all far bloodier and more brutal than the nonchalant and cheeky nature of the film would have you expect, and it doesn't help that occasionally the visual geography of a fight can be inconsistent or downright wrong given previous or following shots. While this one wasn't for me, it did have one of the most hilarious moments in Kung Fu film history when a large sword was quickly chopped to bits by hand. If only the rest of the film had committed to that level of zany action-comedy. The Kid with The Golden Arm wasn't that great, but it's not truly terrible either.
Cameron Geiser is an avid consumer of films and books about filmmakers. He'll watch any film at least once, and can usually be spotted at the annual Traverse City Film Festival in Northern Michigan. He also writes about film over at www.spacecortezwrites.com.